Dear Pandanus Beach: Apparently You’re Queensland’s “Worst” Beach. We Still Love You.
Dear Pandanus Beach,
We need to talk.
You’ve made the news.
And unfortunately, it’s not because anyone has finally discovered the enormous swell rolling into Wynnum.
Secret Brisbane recently reported that Pandanus Beach in Wynnum was the lowest-rated Queensland beach in a new analysis of Google Maps reviews.
Ouch.
The study looked at 366 Australian beaches with at least 50 reviews and ranked them using their average Google rating, number of reviews and share of one-star reviews.
Pandanus Beach came in with an average rating of 4.35 stars.
Which, to be fair, is still 4.35 stars.
But apparently that’s enough to earn you the dubious honour of being Queensland’s lowest-ranked beach.
And we have to admit…
This feels extremely on brand for Wynnum Surf Club.
We probably should have seen this coming
Wynnum Surf Club was never created because Wynnum was hiding some secret world-class surf break.
Quite the opposite.
The whole joke has always been that we have a surf club in a place where waiting for a decent wave could become a fairly long-term commitment.
Hence:
No Waves. No Worries.
And now our local beach has been given the kind of headline that would probably make most tourism boards quietly close their laptops for the afternoon.
For us?
It somehow makes the story better.
In your defence, Pandanus…
There is one reasonably important bit of context.
Queensland actually performed better than every other state overall in the study.
The 57 Queensland beaches included had an average rating of 4.70, the highest state average in Australia.
And despite some of the headlines, Pandanus Beach wasn’t actually among Australia’s ten lowest-rated beaches.
So perhaps “worst beach in Queensland” sounds a little harsher than the numbers really deserve.
Still…
We’re absolutely going to enjoy it.
Because Wynnum isn’t trying to be the Gold Coast
And that’s kind of the point.
We don’t have to pretend there are six-foot barrels breaking off the Wynnum foreshore.
There aren’t.
We don’t have to pretend the tide doesn’t occasionally disappear halfway to Straddie.
It does.
And we certainly don’t need to pretend Pandanus Beach is competing with Whitehaven Beach for Australia’s next tourism campaign.
What Wynnum does have is personality.
It’s the foreshore.
It’s fish and chips.
It’s the jetty.
It’s kids on bikes.
It’s dogs being walked along the Esplanade.
It’s locals who will fiercely defend the place while simultaneously being the first people to make fun of it.
And that’s much closer to what Wynnum Surf Club has always been about.
So, Pandanus Beach, you’re safe with us
We’re not abandoning you because of one slightly unfortunate headline.
In fact, we may like you even more now.
Because if you’re going to build a surf club in a suburb without much surf, you may as well do it beside the beach that gets called Queensland’s worst.
Turns out the “worst beach in Queensland” might be exactly where Wynnum Surf Club belongs.
Love,
Wynnum Surf Club
No Waves. No Worries.
About the beach rankings
The rankings referenced in this article come from a 2026 analysis of Google Maps reviews covering 366 Australian beaches with at least 50 reviews.
Secret Brisbane reported Pandanus Beach as Queensland’s lowest-ranked beach, with an average rating of 4.35.
Queensland still recorded the highest average beach rating of all six states included in the study.
Source: Secret Brisbane - “This Wynnum beach has been rated the worst in QLD”